I always read what I write out loud to my resident proofer (my husband) and I almost couldn't make it through this one without shedding tears. I appreciate it, Beverley.
I'm so glad your brother has healed enough to get his degree. What a nightmare for all involved. Vietnam was 'our war' and as a young Army wife, it was sad to see soldiers come back with no joy in their hearts nor child in their eyes. You wrote this so very well, thank you for your sacrifices as well.
Thank you for your kind words and for sharing your experience. The parallels across generations are heartbreaking, and your empathy means a great deal to me.
Reminder's to all of the human cost of war. I was a military wife for 20 years from 1960-1980 and too young and naive to realize the toll of the boots on the ground soldiers as my ex-husband was an officer and pilot in the Navy, however, as my grandchildren became teenagers, especially the boy's, I adamantly urged them not to join the military. I spent several hours on the campus of local high schools handing out pamphlets that asked the student's to think before they signed letter's of intent to serve to the recruiter's who were always welcomed on the campus while we had to stand on the corner. War is hell! I don't know how our young men and women return and expect to carry on with their lives after they have murdered other humans. Thanks, Shanley, for sharing your experience. I still stand on corner's periodically with signs that read ENOUGH and I am a Pissed Off Gramma. None of my grandchildren have entered the service and if that's in any way attributable to me, I accept it!
Thank you for sharing this and for the courage it takes to speak honestly about what you’ve witnessed. Your willingness to stand on corners, to challenge the narrative, and to protect your grandchildren is deeply moving. War is hell, and too often the human cost is ignored once the uniforms come off. I appreciate your solidarity, your honesty, and the love behind your resistance.
Powerful and eloquent. Just raised my freshly arrived Make American Sane giant cup to toast you and your bother and family. OK it only has water in it, but that's my favorite toast beverage these days.
Thank you, cheers to you and your perfectly sane choice of toast beverage. That Make America Sane mug always makes my day, and we really appreciate your support. We hope to have more mugs and/or other items in the works soon!
Bless you, brave sister & now mother. Wars are fought for MONEY. And Iraq was NO exception. Bless your brother AND you & your family for all your sacrifices. This Venezuela “thing” was the same made up HORRID thing. By a horrible president. We have to move forward. And do the best we can. ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you for your kindness and for seeing the human cost so clearly. I hold deep gratitude for my brother’s survival and for my family’s resilience, and I share your hope that we move forward with more care, honesty, and humanity. That is the best any of us can do.
I read your essays every day and believe they give such an amazing and detailed perspective on what is happening in America and around the world today. I don't live in the US and I'm not an American but I know without any doubt that what your president and his administration of fools are doing is ruining the world..power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely...keep doing what your doing, you're a beacon in a very dark place...thank you
Thank you for taking the time to say this. Hearing from someone outside the U.S. is a powerful reminder that what happens here ripples outward. I’m grateful for your words and for your commitment to seeing clearly in difficult times.
Soon, probably tomorrow, they will dust off the old claim that you aren't "supporting our troops" if you speak up against the war, if you think they shouldn't be sent to fight for oil, or coffee, or bananas
I’ve learned that loving the people who serve sometimes means opposing the systems that use them. My brother paid a heavy price for a war he didn’t choose, and speaking up is one way I honor that truth.
Thank you for writing this, Shanley. I don't share those experiences but I understand horrible tensions in a family and between people you are supposed to love, without reservations.
Amen. My uncle had 5 children and a beautiful wife when his jet went down in the Gulf of Tonkin in 1965. His children and grandchildren (not born for decades) suffered. Suicide, divorce, jail, substance abuse, and more horrors than one good family should have faced as a result of his death in a stupid war. The ripples never end. My heart is with you and all families who suffer endlessly.
Thank you for sharing your poignant family story. Against all logic and compassion, DT has cut back veterans benefits. In an administration of insane actions, this is especially egregious.
Thank you for your compassion. I agree that how we treat veterans after their service says far more than any rhetoric about patriotism. Care and accountability should never be negotiable.
Thank you Shanley for your heart-breaking reflection. May we help create a world where there are no more wars and no more damaged veterans bringing war home to civilian society.
Thank you so much for your kind words. I share that hope deeply, that we can create a world where fewer families carry these wounds, and where healing matters as much as prevention.
This post brought me to tears. I am happy for Shanley's brother who just completed his master’s degree at forty-five years old, and that he found his way to a healthy and happy life. But, yes, the cost. I hope your other siblings are as proud. (My son hopes to eventually get into addiction medicine when he finishes his residency this coming summer. He was not accepted this year for the fellowship at OHSU but he's moving out there to be with his love, so maybe next year.)
Thank you for reading so thoughtfully and for your kind words. It means a great deal to me. I’m incredibly proud of my brother, and I know my siblings carry that pride as well, alongside everything else.
I also want to say how much I admire your son’s path, addiction medicine is such vital, needed work. Having spent much of my own career in healthcare quality, I have deep respect for institutions like OHSU and the role they play in supporting rural and underserved communities. I hope next year brings him the opportunity he’s working toward, and I wish him every success as he continues that journey.
My father never healed from his battle experiences in WWII. He took his own life at age 58. Why the lessons of war can't seem to make a difference still today will always haunt me. Very few sons and daughters of the wealthy, who are in control, serve. They don't feel it up close and personal. Wars over oil are particularly inane. Sincere appreciation to your brother and all the other brothers, sisters, fathers and sons who struggle after coming home from war.
I am so deeply sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing this. You’re right, the lessons of war seem tragically ignored, especially by those who never feel its consequences up close. Your words are a powerful reminder of how far these wounds reach and how long they last. I hold your father, and all families who carry this kind of loss, with deep respect and gratitude.
The cost...is something Trump would never understand. His invasion of Venezuela, with no U.S. deaths, will only lead him to more senseless, self-serving invasions and bravado. And Congress, who could stop him,,,what about them? Who will think about the soldiers like your brother?
That’s exactly the cost I hope people will pause to consider. Decisions made far from the battlefield are carried for a lifetime by soldiers and their families. I believe Congress, and all of us, have a responsibility to think beyond short-term bravado and reckon honestly with those consequences.
Tears shed with this one, bless you and yours.
I always read what I write out loud to my resident proofer (my husband) and I almost couldn't make it through this one without shedding tears. I appreciate it, Beverley.
I'm so glad your brother has healed enough to get his degree. What a nightmare for all involved. Vietnam was 'our war' and as a young Army wife, it was sad to see soldiers come back with no joy in their hearts nor child in their eyes. You wrote this so very well, thank you for your sacrifices as well.
Thank you for your kind words and for sharing your experience. The parallels across generations are heartbreaking, and your empathy means a great deal to me.
War does terrible things to young men. This is was so difficult to read.
Reminder's to all of the human cost of war. I was a military wife for 20 years from 1960-1980 and too young and naive to realize the toll of the boots on the ground soldiers as my ex-husband was an officer and pilot in the Navy, however, as my grandchildren became teenagers, especially the boy's, I adamantly urged them not to join the military. I spent several hours on the campus of local high schools handing out pamphlets that asked the student's to think before they signed letter's of intent to serve to the recruiter's who were always welcomed on the campus while we had to stand on the corner. War is hell! I don't know how our young men and women return and expect to carry on with their lives after they have murdered other humans. Thanks, Shanley, for sharing your experience. I still stand on corner's periodically with signs that read ENOUGH and I am a Pissed Off Gramma. None of my grandchildren have entered the service and if that's in any way attributable to me, I accept it!
Thank you for sharing this and for the courage it takes to speak honestly about what you’ve witnessed. Your willingness to stand on corners, to challenge the narrative, and to protect your grandchildren is deeply moving. War is hell, and too often the human cost is ignored once the uniforms come off. I appreciate your solidarity, your honesty, and the love behind your resistance.
Powerful and eloquent. Just raised my freshly arrived Make American Sane giant cup to toast you and your bother and family. OK it only has water in it, but that's my favorite toast beverage these days.
Thank you, cheers to you and your perfectly sane choice of toast beverage. That Make America Sane mug always makes my day, and we really appreciate your support. We hope to have more mugs and/or other items in the works soon!
Bless you, brave sister & now mother. Wars are fought for MONEY. And Iraq was NO exception. Bless your brother AND you & your family for all your sacrifices. This Venezuela “thing” was the same made up HORRID thing. By a horrible president. We have to move forward. And do the best we can. ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you for your kindness and for seeing the human cost so clearly. I hold deep gratitude for my brother’s survival and for my family’s resilience, and I share your hope that we move forward with more care, honesty, and humanity. That is the best any of us can do.
I read your essays every day and believe they give such an amazing and detailed perspective on what is happening in America and around the world today. I don't live in the US and I'm not an American but I know without any doubt that what your president and his administration of fools are doing is ruining the world..power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely...keep doing what your doing, you're a beacon in a very dark place...thank you
Thank you for taking the time to say this. Hearing from someone outside the U.S. is a powerful reminder that what happens here ripples outward. I’m grateful for your words and for your commitment to seeing clearly in difficult times.
Soon, probably tomorrow, they will dust off the old claim that you aren't "supporting our troops" if you speak up against the war, if you think they shouldn't be sent to fight for oil, or coffee, or bananas
I’ve learned that loving the people who serve sometimes means opposing the systems that use them. My brother paid a heavy price for a war he didn’t choose, and speaking up is one way I honor that truth.
Thank you for writing this, Shanley. I don't share those experiences but I understand horrible tensions in a family and between people you are supposed to love, without reservations.
Thank you for your honesty and empathy. It means a great deal to feel understood, even across different experiences.
Amen. My uncle had 5 children and a beautiful wife when his jet went down in the Gulf of Tonkin in 1965. His children and grandchildren (not born for decades) suffered. Suicide, divorce, jail, substance abuse, and more horrors than one good family should have faced as a result of his death in a stupid war. The ripples never end. My heart is with you and all families who suffer endlessly.
I’m so sorry for your family’s loss. You’re right, the ripples of war extend far beyond a single life. Thank you for sharing this.
Thank you for sharing your poignant family story. Against all logic and compassion, DT has cut back veterans benefits. In an administration of insane actions, this is especially egregious.
Thank you for your compassion. I agree that how we treat veterans after their service says far more than any rhetoric about patriotism. Care and accountability should never be negotiable.
Thank you Shanley for your heart-breaking reflection. May we help create a world where there are no more wars and no more damaged veterans bringing war home to civilian society.
Thank you so much for your kind words. I share that hope deeply, that we can create a world where fewer families carry these wounds, and where healing matters as much as prevention.
This post brought me to tears. I am happy for Shanley's brother who just completed his master’s degree at forty-five years old, and that he found his way to a healthy and happy life. But, yes, the cost. I hope your other siblings are as proud. (My son hopes to eventually get into addiction medicine when he finishes his residency this coming summer. He was not accepted this year for the fellowship at OHSU but he's moving out there to be with his love, so maybe next year.)
Thank you for reading so thoughtfully and for your kind words. It means a great deal to me. I’m incredibly proud of my brother, and I know my siblings carry that pride as well, alongside everything else.
I also want to say how much I admire your son’s path, addiction medicine is such vital, needed work. Having spent much of my own career in healthcare quality, I have deep respect for institutions like OHSU and the role they play in supporting rural and underserved communities. I hope next year brings him the opportunity he’s working toward, and I wish him every success as he continues that journey.
My father never healed from his battle experiences in WWII. He took his own life at age 58. Why the lessons of war can't seem to make a difference still today will always haunt me. Very few sons and daughters of the wealthy, who are in control, serve. They don't feel it up close and personal. Wars over oil are particularly inane. Sincere appreciation to your brother and all the other brothers, sisters, fathers and sons who struggle after coming home from war.
I am so deeply sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing this. You’re right, the lessons of war seem tragically ignored, especially by those who never feel its consequences up close. Your words are a powerful reminder of how far these wounds reach and how long they last. I hold your father, and all families who carry this kind of loss, with deep respect and gratitude.
Beautifully written and heart-breaking. Thank you.
Thank you so much for reading and for your kind words. I truly appreciate you taking the time to sit with it.
The cost...is something Trump would never understand. His invasion of Venezuela, with no U.S. deaths, will only lead him to more senseless, self-serving invasions and bravado. And Congress, who could stop him,,,what about them? Who will think about the soldiers like your brother?
That’s exactly the cost I hope people will pause to consider. Decisions made far from the battlefield are carried for a lifetime by soldiers and their families. I believe Congress, and all of us, have a responsibility to think beyond short-term bravado and reckon honestly with those consequences.
Powerful and thought provoking. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for reading so thoughtfully. It means a great deal to know it resonated with you.