Unfit to Serve, Unseen by Choice

Markets rally as Trump vanishes, while his administration quietly revokes emergency abortion rights, targets trans inmates, and chases political staffers down hallways.

Good morning! It turns out the most effective economic stimulus might be a presidential muzzle. Since Donald Trump vanished from public view on Friday, no golf cart photo-ops, no executive orders, no shouty Truth Social videos, markets have been positively euphoric. Stocks continued to climb Tuesday as investors enjoyed a rare stretch of Trump-free tranquility. He hasn’t commented on Ukraine’s extraordinary string of military victories, nor has he graced a microphone or camera. Insiders whisper that could change by the weekend, but for now, Wall Street is soaking in the silence like a spa day.

Of course, even in Trump’s absence, the administration is hard at work undermining rights and sowing confusion. On Tuesday, officials quietly shredded Biden-era guidance that had protected emergency abortion care under EMTALA, the federal law requiring hospitals to stabilize anyone in a medical crisis. Biden’s 2022 directive had made it clear that when a pregnancy threatens a woman’s life, stabilizing her might involve an abortion, even in states that ban it. Trump’s team torched that clarification and substituted a murky new standard: hospitals must now weigh the “health of both the pregnant woman and the unborn child,” and prioritize whichever is more “viable.” Translation: welcome to the viability Olympics, where doctors get to gamble on legal outcomes while patients hemorrhage. Civil rights advocates called the change medically reckless and legally deranged. Meanwhile, Trump’s new HHS Secretary, Martin Makary, confirmed he’s reviewing access to mifepristone, the abortion pill, after receiving a concerned note from Senator Josh Hawley, whose medical expertise begins and ends with whatever gets applause in a Missouri diner.

The CDC lost another public health professional this week, but not to burnout or budget cuts, this one walked out the door on principle. Dr. Lakshmi Panagiotakopoulos, who helped oversee COVID-19 vaccine recommendations, resigned Tuesday after HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. bypassed the CDC’s advisory process and unilaterally ordered changes to federal vaccine guidance. Her farewell note was refreshingly candid: she could no longer do her job under an administration that prioritizes political theatrics over immunology. The final straw? Kennedy’s directive stripping pregnant women from vaccine guidance entirely, despite their higher risk for severe COVID outcomes. Experts called it reckless; Kennedy called it “common sense.” Public health officials, meanwhile, are whispering what everyone’s thinking: “More of us should be resigning in protest.” At this rate, the CDC may soon stand for Centers for Deference to Conspiracies.

In the realm of tech bros with messiah complexes, Elon Musk has fully entered his post-loyalty era, and the target is Donald Trump. The feud, long percolating beneath passive-aggressive jabs, exploded this week into a full-scale ideological divorce. Musk slammed Trump’s marquee legislation as a “disgusting abomination” and accused Congress, Trump’s Congress, of “betraying the American people.” He reposted Rand Paul’s declaration of rebellion and all but called for a Republican midterm purge, saying, “We fire all politicians who voted for it.” That’s not a metaphor. He literally wants them gone. Meanwhile, Trump has yet to respond publicly, possibly because he’s too busy golfing or fuming in a bunker lined with tariff graphs. The White House, when asked about Musk’s tirades, offered a noncommittal “The president knows where Elon stands,” which is D.C.-speak for “We’re not touching that with a 10-foot emotional support flamethrower.” Musk, meanwhile, has gone full doomsday economist, warning that Social Security, defense, and “everything else” will vanish under Trump’s deficit spending, unless Bitcoin saves us. It’s unclear whether he’s high on data or dogecoin, but one thing is certain: we are now in the “mutually assured tantrum” phase of the MAGA–Silicon Valley divorce.

In a gesture of stunning insecurity masquerading as policy, Acting Navy Secretary Pete Hegseth has approved the quiet renaming of the USNS Harvey Milk, yes, the Navy ship named after the slain gay rights icon, just days into Pride Month. The new name? The USNS Resolute, a term so bland it could double as a cologne for closeted fascists. Hegseth claims the change “better reflects our warfighting spirit,” which in Trump-world means sanitizing history until it’s just beige enough to pass inspection by Steve Bannon’s group chat. The administration didn’t announce the move publicly, it leaked through a fringe blog, which is how you know they’re proud of it. LGBTQ+ veterans called it a deliberate insult, while one Navy source reportedly described it as “like stripping the rainbow off a war medal.” Happy Pride, from the people who think visibility is a threat.

The administration’s rollback of transgender rights hit a legal snag. A Trump executive order redefined sex exclusively as “assigned at birth,” a move designed to strip federal protections for trans people, including in prisons. But on Tuesday, U.S. District Judge Royce Lamberth slammed the brakes, at least partially, ruling that the Bureau of Prisons must continue providing gender-affirming care, including hormone therapy, under the Eighth Amendment. The broader Trump directive remains in place, but for now, the ruling offers a lifeline to incarcerated trans individuals. It’s not quite a victory, but in this political climate, a temporary injunction feels like divine intervention.

In yet another episode of “authoritarian cosplay comes to life,” DHS officers stormed into Rep. Jerry Nadler’s Manhattan district office and handcuffed one of his staffers, apparently under the impression that aiding immigrants is now a subversive act. The scene played out not in some border hot zone but inside a federal building that also houses an immigration court, where Nadler’s staff had the audacity to allow immigrant rights advocates in after witnessing DHS agents detaining people inside the premises. The agents, not to be outdone by facts or decorum, accused the staff of “harboring rioters.” Nadler, understandably irate, said they entered without a warrant and used unnecessary force. The staffer was eventually released without charges, but the message was clear: criticize the Trump regime and its deportation machinery, and you might just get the banana republic welcome wagon. Nadler and fellow Democrats are now demanding answers from DHS Secretary Kristi Noem, who seems to think her job is less “public servant” and more “wannabe borderland warlord.” Legal experts say the whole affair reeks of unconstitutional power grabs and strongman theater, a warning shot aimed not just at Democrats, but at democracy itself.

The United Nations Security Council is expected to vote today on a ceasefire resolution in Gaza, though whether Donald Trump lets it pass remains anyone’s guess. His administration has so far refused to say if it will veto the measure, even as the U.S.-backed Gaza Humanitarian Foundation (GHF) suspended all aid operations following yet another Israeli strike that killed dozens of civilians near one of its food distribution sites. The GHF, criticized for outsourcing logistics to private U.S. contractors and cozying up to Trumpworld operatives, declared the situation “untenable” and asked Israeli forces for clearer crowd control guidelines, because nothing says humanitarian aid like asking the bombers to please aim better. The Red Cross and U.N. have flatly refused to collaborate with GHF, citing safety concerns and the minor detail that humanitarian groups typically don’t double as political weapons.

In Florida, a veteran meteorologist all but broke down on air this week, giving viewers a dire warning not about an approaching storm, but about the Trump administration’s destruction of the agencies that used to warn us about them. John Morales, a weatherman with over three decades of experience, said he can no longer confidently predict hurricanes due to mass layoffs, equipment cutbacks, and Trump’s hiring freeze at the National Weather Service and NOAA. “I can’t do this anymore,” he said, playing a clip of his calm, steady forecasting during Hurricane Dorian, then contrasting it with the chaos today. With 20–40% understaffing across Florida forecast centers and a 17% reduction in weather balloon launches nationwide, the science is literally degrading before our eyes. The administration’s obsession with “efficiency” has made overnight forecasting impossible in some offices. As Morales put it, lives are at risk. But don’t worry, while meteorologists fight to warn us of Category 5 storms, MAGA influencers are rage-posting about tacos and digitally aging Jill Biden. America, 2025: less Doppler, more doomscroll.

To the north, Canada is choking on climate chaos. Wildfires across Saskatchewan and Manitoba have forced the evacuation of over 26,000 people, torched vast swaths of land, and pushed smoke across the Atlantic all the way to Europe, an unwanted Canadian export if ever there was one. Air quality alerts now blanket the American Midwest and East Coast, while Alberta’s oil sands operations are partially shut down due to safety concerns. Officials warn this may be Canada’s worst wildfire season in recorded history, though the Trump administration has remained characteristically silent, possibly out of respect for the fossil fuels trapped in the blaze.

And back home, the “who could’ve seen this coming” file gained another entry. A Telegraph investigation has confirmed that Darren Beattie, the Trump State Department official who dismantled the agency’s counter-disinformation unit, has direct family ties to the Kremlin. Beattie is married to the niece of Sergei Chernikov, a former Putin campaign fixer who helped orchestrate the Russian autocrat’s original rise to power. That might explain why Beattie has spent years parroting Kremlin propaganda, pushing conspiracy theories about U.S.-backed “color revolutions,” and portraying democracy as a deep-state psyop. Despite being booted from the first Trump administration for attending a white nationalist event, Beattie has somehow re-emerged with a security clearance and access to sensitive intelligence on, you guessed it, Russia. In this administration, sedition isn’t a bug; it’s a résumé booster.

And finally, in today’s only feel-good story, sulfur-crested cockatoos in Western Sydney have been caught on camera learning to operate public drinking fountains. The birds twist the handles with one foot while balancing with the other, proving themselves smarter than most conspiracy theorists and better hydrated than most Floridians. Researchers say the behavior has spread across multiple flocks, with some “cockies” succeeding 70% of the time. In a world on fire, literally and figuratively, it’s nice to know someone’s staying cool.