Chainsaws, Cover Charges, and Kremlin Comfort

Trump rages at the press, sells visas to the wealthy, levels historic trees, and leaves Putin free to bomb Ukraine while his $15 billion lawsuit collapses in court.

Good morning! Trump has once again managed to turn a single week into a demolition derby of institutions, history, and truth itself, and as always, he insists on live-streaming the carnage through the very media he despises but cannot live without. The man is like a parasite that spends half its time gnawing at its host and the other half begging it not to die. Yesterday’s Oval Office press gaggle was a perfect case study. Trump sneered “you’re really obnoxious” at a Black woman reporter, his favorite punching bag archetype, while insisting networks that criticize him should lose their licenses. Free speech, he explained, is free only if it flatters him. At the same time, he called the press “illegal” for giving him 97% negative coverage, while bragging that his social media numbers are breaking records. He can’t decide if the media is a mortal enemy or his most prized narcotic, so he settles for both.

The supposed “policy” centerpiece was a pay-to-stay immigration racket. Trump announced a $100,000 annual fee for H-1B visas, effectively a ransom on the very tech and healthcare workers American companies depend on. Then, with the flourish of a casino owner unveiling a new slot machine, he rolled out the so-called “Gold Card”: for $1 million, or $2 million if sponsored by a company, foreigners can buy their way into America with expedited visas. Ellis Island has been reborn as a velvet-rope nightclub, and the only requirement for entry is that you can make it rain in the Treasury lobby. Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick gushed about how the program will let in only the “extraordinary” while raising billions. In reality, it’s Trumpism distilled: treat immigrants as a cash cow while insisting you’re protecting the homeland from “the bottom quartile.” If Lady Liberty still has that torch, she should probably pawn it for the entrance fee.

And while Trump was busy declaring “war” on Memphis, Chicago, and New Orleans, yep, he really used the word “war” to describe sending in federal agents as though American cities were enemy territory, Vladimir Putin was conducting an actual war. Overnight, Russia launched one of its largest assaults yet on Ukraine, hurling hundreds of drones and missiles at civilian infrastructure. According to Bloomberg, Putin feels emboldened because he’s convinced Trump won’t lift a finger in defense of Kyiv or NATO. Why would he? Trump shrugs at Russian jets violating Estonian airspace but rages about hecklers at a Washington crab shack. He spends his energy railing against women chanting “Free Palestine” while the Kremlin’s drones buzz over Poland. Authoritarians everywhere can read the pattern: Trump saves his venom for Americans who mock him and reserves indulgence for foreign despots who flatter him.

Meanwhile, the domestic wrecking ball keeps swinging. He’s literally ripping out the White House’s historic trees, Jackson’s magnolia, Arthur’s plantings, two centuries of living history, to clear space for a gaudy ballroom. Why merely torch democratic institutions when you can bulldoze 200-year-old oaks while you’re at it? On Air Force One, he told the press to “fly safely” only because he was on the plane, otherwise he wouldn’t care. Then, like the frail snowflake he is, he said women who protested him in a D.C. restaurant should go to jail for being a “threat.” He railed against windmills, solar farms, and even birds, claiming renewable energy is “bad for the environment.” He bragged about lowering drug prices by “a thousand percent” in a word salad that somehow described raising costs. And his hand-picked HHS Secretary RFK Jr. is dismantling the vaccine system brick by brick, making it harder for kids to get shots against measles, mumps, rubella, hepatitis. Nothing screams freedom like condemning children to preventable diseases.

But here’s the kicker: for all this abuse of the media, the immigrants, the protesters, the scientists, the environment, and the truth, Trump still can’t bully the courts. His $15 billion defamation suit against the New York Times was laughed out of court by Judge Steven Merryday, a George H.W. Bush appointee, who dismissed it as a “vexatious press release.” Trump wanted discovery to be another stage for his grievance opera, but instead the judge handed him a broom and told him to sweep his garbage off the docket. It’s a perfect reminder that in the one arena where evidence actually matters, Trump’s theatrics collapse like one of his debt-soaked casinos.

So here we are: Putin escalates abroad, Trump bulldozes at home, the courts swat down his fantasies, and the press he abuses keeps carrying his every word. It’s abusive codependency as governance, and we’re all stuck on the flight with him, hoping the pilot lands safely, even as the demented passenger in chief sneers that he wouldn’t care if we weren’t onboard.

With that, I’ll confess: Marz and I hit the snooze button a few extra times this morning. But after a strong cup of coffee and a good romp to shake off the cobwebs, we’ll be back at it, fully charged and ready to keep shining light on the madness.